With children

Divorce is always a bitter pill to swallow. You made a life with some one. Someone whom you cared deeply for at one time and took vows to be together, then something or a series of somethings changed all that.It's even harder with kids involved. once everything is said and done in court it gets a bit easier since there are schedules and days and structure that all parties have to follow. Before all that however it's tough. Especially when the other party uses your child as a bargaining chip or a tool to get back at you or dig under your skin. It's wrong and juvenile and sadly quite common, even in ex couples who swore they'd never do that to each other. What can we do in these circumstances? Honestly I don't know. I try to keep one foot forward and my head up. Knowing that my daughter doesn't truly hate me, that she does want to see me. Every time I see her and have visits I make the best of them and ignore the hurt when I have to give her back. But It still does get under my skin when he lies and says she doesn't want to call, or see me. Even though I talk to her and she always seems thrilled when she does get to talk. We just have to keep going. push the hurt away and know confidently that its just a lie to cause pain. And also to know that one day our children will be grown ups themselves and will see the right and wrong. They will make their own conscious choice whether and when to see us. And of course that one thing all parents must learn: patcience